PRIDE AND PAIN

Pride and pain

I'm not insane

Pride and pain

In this game

Lost a lot

Lots to gain

Pride and pain

Learn their manners

Know my worth

Pride and pain

Pride and pain

In this game

No pain no gain...

©el-iyanu

Sometimes, I deliberately behave indifferent just to see how some people behave. As if to measure if something is worth my energy, if it's truly worth my time. I kind of punish myself to see if people really need my skillset. I don't really know how to explain it, but I guess I want to feel special, feel important, treated well and properly, not just like anybody or everybody, or somebody. Sometimes, it hurts because I get left out a lot. I keep my silence, I keep my pride. I wonder if it's right or wrong. I feel proud to be strong enough to stay away, but it's pain to not be doing what you love.